So Close: A Series of Related SongFics
by surfergirl11
Summary: A series of three related songfics between Elphaba and Glinda. Takes place before the melting scene. Elphaba & Glinda's POV. Read and Review! Formerly, "Look At What I've Done".
1. Chapter 1

This songfic takes places right after Glinda and Elphaba sing "For Good" in the musical and before the melting scene

**This songfic takes places right after Glinda and Elphaba sing "For Good" in the musical and before the melting scene. It is what is going through Elphaba's mind. The song is "Look At What I've Done" by Chris Cagle. It's an amazingly beautiful song. This is my first songfic so I would really appreciate any comments!**

_I saw it in her eyes when I was saying goodbye_

_That girl, she ain't gonna be all right_

'Glinda, please, don't cry.' I thought to myself. 'Please don't make this any harder than it has to be.'

'_Cause I could tell, she'd be going through a living hell_

_And I wouldn't be there by her side_

The beautiful, bubbly blonde that stood in front of me looked away as tears began to spill over her eyelids, leaving black streaks in their wake.

_And Lord, I felt so bad as I sat and watched her cry_

_Thinking I was moving on and she was barely getting by_

If I could change this, everything that had happened, I would, just for her. I hated seeing her this way. Girls like her weren't suppose to have their world turned upside down. They were suppose to be happy.

_Yeah, look at what I've done to her_

_Look at how I've made her feel_

Tears threatened my own eyes as I pulled her into a hug. The last hug that we would ever share. I felt her sob into my shoulder and it shattered my heart.

_And look at what it's done to me_

_You've got to know it tears me up_

_I gave it everything I had and lord, it just wasn't enough_

I tried. They didn't accept it. No one in Oz would, except for her. There isn't any other way to end all this fighting. I have to do this. I have to die. But strangely, it didn't hurt as much as I thought it would. As I gazed into her eyes, I gave her a small smile and wiped away her tears. I would do this for her. I had the strength to surrender because of her. I just wish there was another way. Oz, what I would give for another way.

_Hurting her like this seems so wrong_

_Look at what I've done to her_

_Now she's alone_


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, so this started out as just one songfic, but as of now, I'm making it into a series of three related fics

**Okay, so this started out as just one songfic, but as of now, I'm making it into a series of three related fics. And, ironically, it has turned into Gelphie, which I didn't intend but I think it works much better. This is the other part of the song "Look At What I've Done" by Chris Cagle. Let me know what y'all think! And look for the next and last (as of now) installment! **

I went into the Emerald City on occasion, painting my skin a cream color and wearing a long cloak. I told myself that it was for groceries and such, but who was I kidding? It was the possibility of seeing her that had eluded me every week for a year.

_I saw her out last night_

_And she was having a good time_

She truly did look happy. She took everyone's breath away, as always. She was too far away to notice me and she wouldn't have had she looked in my direction anyhow. She was smiling, that smile that always seemed to light up a room.

_That girl, it looks like she's doing fine_

_But then I saw a man walk up and take her by the hand_

_And I, oh God, I almost died_

That was something that I hadn't been expecting. It took all I could not to blow my cover. I was in shock. I was furious. But then it melted away; it was partly my fault. After all, I had never told her how I felt about her. How much that I loved her. How could I have expected her not to have a boyfriend?

_And then it hit me_

_She didn't really need me_

She had moved on. She was over me and who could blame her? It had been a year. She was entitled to happiness. And let's face it, that happiness would have never been with me.

_She's standing tall, she's got it all_

_Got the world at her heels_

This was what Glinda had always wanted. She was a public figure and greatly admired by everyone in Oz. Maybe it was better this way. I could have never given her that kind of lifestyle. She would have spent a life hidden away, being shunned by everyone except the Animals. She would have been miserable. Here, at least, she looked so happy. That's all I wanted for her. And if she was happy, then it lessened the pain that I felt somewhat.

_And look at what it's done to me_

_Look at how it makes me hurt_

I missed her terribly. I couldn't deny that. No matter how much I lied to Fiyero and ultimately myself, I couldn't change it. I love her more than anything and it killed me to have to keep this secret. I guess we do some crazy things for the people that we love. But, what I wouldn't give to go back to that fateful day at Kiamo Ko.

_If I could go back now, I'd find a way to make it work_

_Ain't life funny?_

_Now I'm the one alone_

Alone. I hated the way that sounded so final. But it was the truth. I do love Fiyero, but I love her so much more. And it didn't matter who was around me, as long as she wasn't, I was truly alone.

_Yeah, look at what I've done to me_

_She's gone_


	3. Chapter 3

My friends say they're proud of me

**The last installment of this three piece songfic. I recently discovered this song and it really got me thinking. I can personally relate and I felt that it suited Glinda really well. Let me know what you think! The song is "Invisibly Shaken" by Rodney Atkins. Glinda's POV.**

_My friends say they're proud of me_

_For taking our break up so casually_

_But they don't see what lies beneath my smile_

This was the party of the year. I used to love social events such as this. I looked as elegant as ever in my usual ball gown that flowed out of the carriage like water as I stepped out. I smiled, taking his hand. Tylan had become a very close friend of mine ever since that dreadful night but he would never become more than that. My heart, though broken and shattered as it was, belonged to someone already long gone.

_It appears that I'm okay_

_That I moved on when you walked away_

I've kept up my appearances. I've kept my promise. I lead the people of Oz with grace and poise, always cheerful and positive. They need someone like that in these desperate times. They all say how much they adore me, that they love me. They know nothing about me.

_But the truth is, since you said goodbye_

_I'm invisibly shaken_

_Quietly breaking_

_Desperately taking one breath at a time_

They don't see me cry myself to sleep every night. They don't see the pain I feel. It hurts to breathe, to laugh, to smile. They don't see how hard it is to just get out of bed in the morning because you're not here.

_Beneath this composure, I know it's over_

_But baby, I'm dying cause you can't be mine_

Why? Why hadn't I told you how I felt when I had the chance? Deep down, I never really thought that you wouldn't be here. I guess that's why I didn't tell you. You were so strong. How could someone have killed you with something as simple as water, let alone a child?

_But I will never show the toll it's taken_

'_Cause I'm invisibly shaken_

I can't show my true feelings. Not so much because I don't want the Ozians to see my cry, but because if I start I don't think I will be able to stop. Oh, Elphie! I would give all of this back just to spend another day with you. I regret not telling you how I felt. I regret it everyday. But no one can know that, ever. So I just have to grin and bear it. As I take Tylan's arm, I glance back to the crowd. I still feel you around.


End file.
